I make a beautiful website design for these people and what do they give me? Terrible, terrible photos! Then they call up saying that they don't like their images. What the hell do you want me to do about it? It's so depressing
Erect a tree in the middle of Victoria Square and don't decorate it. Doing us proud, Australia!
Back in August I blogged about something that really pisses me off: When applications install in to your C drive regardless of where you tell it to install.
Another thing that is similar and just as heinous is when you download a program, run the installer and then the installer downloads another installer. Again.
If this isn't the installer, what is it? An installer for the installer? Redundant much?
I could give a flying fuck if you want me to have the latest version. Create an auto-updater for your software if you want everyone to be on the bleeding edge. I downloaded the setup file because I wanted it to be accessible from anywhere. If I knew this was just going to be a proxy for the real setup I would have just run it from my temp files after it had finished downloading. I chose to save the file so I could use it anywhere and any time. Now I need to be attached to the internet just to install your stupid browser that nobody takes seriously anyway. I guess I shouldn't be surprised, this is Google after all, not exactly king of the software realm. Unfortunately though, they aren't the only ones that do this.
Dear developers: Stop it. Just stop it. It's not clever. It's not cool. It's stupid and you're stupid for thinking it's any good. Just quit it.
Continuing today's ragey theme, why the fuck do things require space on the C: drive when I explicitly tell it to install to another drive?
Adobe's Audition music editor is the latest culprit of this stupid and archaic trend. The program requires ~350mb of disk space. During the installation it asks where you want to install it, so I decide to install it on to my 750GB drive I've named Local Data. So you know what it does? It installs about 50mb in to the drive I told it to install in to and the other 300 in to my C. Why? Why even ask me where I want to install it if you're just going to stick it all in C anyway. Fuck you. No wonder I never have any free space on C.
So I was thinking about that whole Keith Urban suing himself over his website dealeo that happened a couple of millennia ago. I was thinking I was, that if I were to ever get famous and find out that another person had exactly the same name as me, I wouldn't sue them. I would legally adopt them as my brother. If that doesn't take, then I'd be more than happy to legally define them as my clone.
Then when I get invited to all the boring parties and functions, I can send the other one instead. When the party organisers get upset I'd get my PR agent to say that we got our wires crossed, and that they should be more specific next time. Then I'd get like, flowers and apology cards and stuff.
I'd have to get them to specify that it's the pretty one that they want, the one that gets all the girls and looks absolutely fabulous all day long. That way there would be no doubt that it is the real me that they want. Sure they might hurt my clone's feelings, but I'm sure he'd get over it and not go on a Hulk-calibre rampage throughout whatever town/city we happened to be close to at the time, killing millions and injuring millions more, only to be assaulted by the various armies of the world until he is ultimately brought down by the love he feels for this one chick he met one time while we were on vacation in Tibet. Not while I'm on the clock!